Why Knowing What Drains You Matters as Much as What Excites You

When we talk about personal development or career fulfilment, the conversation usually revolves around passion.

Find what excites you.
Do what you love.
Follow your energy.
And while those are powerful ideas, they’re only half the equation.
Because just as important as knowing what lights you up—
is understanding what drains you.



The Hidden Cost of Ignoring What Drains You

We all have tasks, situations, and relationships that quietly deplete our energy. Maybe it’s:

• Endless meetings that go nowhere.

• Administrative work that feels soul-sucking.

• A relationship that takes more than it gives.

• The pressure of constantly saying yes.

When you ignore these energy drains, they don’t just make you tired, they erode your motivation, creativity, and clarity.

Burnout doesn’t come from doing too much of what you love. It comes from spending too much time on what doesn’t align with who you are.



Energy Awareness: The Missing Skill

Most people can describe what excites them: the projects, causes, or people that make them feel alive.

But few people can clearly name what depletes them and even fewer take steps to reduce it.

Energy awareness is a form of emotional intelligence. It’s the ability to track how different activities affect your mental, emotional, and physical state.

When you develop it, you stop making decisions based purely on what looks good on paper, and start making them based on what feels right in practice.



How to Identify What Drains You

Here’s a simple self-awareness exercise to try for one week:

1. Track Your Energy, Not Just Your Time

At the end of each day, write down:

• What gave me energy today?

• What drained my energy today?

• How do I feel right now—on a scale of 1–10?

Patterns will emerge surprisingly quickly.

2. Notice Physical Cues

Your body often knows before your brain does.
Do you tense up before a certain task? Feel restless in certain meetings?
Those are clues worth paying attention to.

3. Ask Yourself “Why?”

Once you’ve spotted your energy drains, dig deeper.
Is it the work itself, the environment, the people, or the expectations?
Understanding why something drains you helps you change it more effectively.


How to Rebalance Your Energy

• Set Boundaries
• Protect your focus and energy like a scarce resource—because it is.
• Say no to what doesn’t align with your values or goals.
• Delegate or Adjust
• If something drains you but can’t be avoided entirely, can you delegate it, automate it, or change the way you do it?
• Offset with Energising Activities
• You can’t eliminate every energy drain, but you can balance it out. Schedule something that replenishes you after something that depletes you.
• Review Regularly
• Your energy landscape changes as your work and life evolve. Check in every few months to reassess what gives and what takes.

Why This Matters for Leaders, Teams, and Careers

For leaders, understanding what drains and energises your people is a game-changer.
When team members are drained, creativity drops, collaboration suffers, and performance declines.

When they’re energised, everything flows.

For individuals, this awareness helps you make better career and life choices, not just chasing excitement, but designing sustainability.

Because energy, not time, is your most precious resource.



Final Thought

Passion tells you where to go.

But awareness of what drains you tells you how long you can stay there.

Success isn’t just about chasing what excites you, it’s about creating a rhythm between energy and rest, joy and boundaries, enthusiasm and self-awareness.

When you understand both sides of your energy — what fills you and what empties you — you don’t just work better. You live better.